This is the easy part...

I just sat down and made up my training schedule for next week, and it was a little tight even considering that I'm only fitting in (3) 30 minute runs.  20 weeks from now I'm going to be cramming in 9-milers somehow... But one step at a time.

My snippets of free time are during lunch and after work.  The upside of Adam's retail work schedule is that he goes in later, and thus Brenden doesn't go to daycare until 8:30 at the earliest.  I go in at 7 and get off at 4, so I don't have to feel guilty after taking an hour to train or run errands before I pick Brenden up at 5. 

Monday:
Lunch - Target shopping
After work - 30 minute run

Tuesday:
Lunch - Home with Adam
After work - 30 minute run

Wednesday:
Lunch - Consultation appt. w/Adam (we're meeting with a urologist about a vasectomy-more about that later)
After work - home with the guys right after work

Thursday:
Lunch - 30 minute walk
After work - grocery shopping

Friday:
Lunch - Free time
After work - 30 minute run


I'm looking forward to getting more fit during my training, but I also hope it has a calming effect mentally.  I know plenty of people who manage multiple children gracefully, but I have just one sweet boy who makes me feel like I should check myself into the state hospital some days.  Like today, he had a meltdown before naptime, which was my fault because we were out too long this morning and he was overtired.  So between kicking myself for that, and feeling like I had zero control in the situation, I was extremely frustrated.  Being a parent really highlights your best and worst features.  When I have my head in the game, I am dedicated and can do just about anything.  But if I feel like I don't have control or start to beat myself up for not being as good and I "should" be, I'm a  mess.

I read an article in Yoga Journal about how yoga and meditation aren't the only ways to calm your mind.  You can use just about any method to help develop focus.  I'd like to use running as a way to manage anxiety and the mental churning that sometimes drives me nuts.  If I can focus all my energy on running a few more yards when I'm getting tired, surely I can focus on pushing through a few minutes of screaming without losing my composure.